"When you run with destruction in your heart, you find yourself in mine fields all the time."
– Gabby Rivera
About twenty years ago, I did something that fundamentally changed my life.
Whenever I was driving and someone did something that made me angry or cynical or aggressive or judgmental, I didn't look at them.
That's it. That's all I did.
Someone cut me off. Didn't look at them. Someone going twenty MPH getting on the freeway. Didn't look at them. Someone failed to signal. Didn't look at them.
Initially, I noticed I'd still get angry, but by not identifying the person, I stopped perpetuating a story about who they were, why they did what they did, and how I was somehow their intentional victim.
Very quickly, the severity and duration of my emotions decreased significantly until I rarely had negative emotions while driving at all.
Then I applied the same principle to other parts of my life. I stopped judging, begrudging, gossiping, scolding.
And I began to experience an infinite increase in mental and intellectual bandwidth that was previously unavailable to me.
I stopped taking things personally. I no longer gave my attention to emotions and ideas and people and situations that didn't deserve my attention.
And now I live in a world with far fewer mine fields.