Back Before I Started Telling My Stories

"Can we trust each other with our true stories? That's where we find belonging."

Jennifer Brown

Back when I was too embarrassed to tell anyone I had a gay dad.

Back when my family was too poor to afford cool clothes and I got bullied.

Back when I had a "job" stealing quarters out of newspaper racks because it paid more than minimum wage at Souplantation.

Back when I was ashamed to live in an apartment when most of my friends lived in houses.

Back when I was casually racist and sexist and homophobic – not out of malice, but out of ignorance.

Back when I judged people on whether they were good at sports.

Back when I chose my friends by the amount of beers they could shotgun.

Back when I almost flunked out of college because of aforementioned drinking and sports.

Back when I didn't read.

Back when I listened to A Tribe Called Quest and thought I had "culture".

Back when I mocked and dismissed and othered and ignored everything I didn't know or care about.

Back when I wasn't truly connected to anything, or anyone, or anywhere.

Back when I was lying and #covering and bullshitting.

Back when I was insecure and lonely and immature.

Back when I didn't know to whom or where or what I belonged.

Back when I was afraid to trust.

Back before I started telling my stories.