The other day, I shared that I just started a book on empathy, mindfulness, and communication. That I was blown away by the opening paragraph. That I knew it was going to be a great read.
I was right.
So many takeaways to share, but here is one concept that I find absolutely critical (and perhaps counterintuitive to some):
We empathize to meet our own needs.
That's right.
But it's not selfish. Far from it. We empathize because we need connection with other people.
Empathy is a progressive path – a journey, if you like, that we go on – in four stages:
1. Bodily awareness, which provides a base for mindfulness.
2. We cultivate mindfulness so we can practice self-empathy.
3. We cultivate self-empathy so we can empathize with others.
4. We cultivate empathy for others as a base for compassion for everyone.
Powerful stuff, that is.
The more we know who we are, what we need, how we tell our story. . .the more ably we will connect with others' realities, experiences, and stories.
Do your personal development work, folks.
You can't just turn empathy on and off for certain people, situations, contexts. It doesn't work that way.
Empathy is a way of being. And you have to be intentional about it.
So are you being intentional?